solution to pain avoidance

Hey ,

I was in pain...massive pain.

And I was avoiding all the things I needed to do...

Cleaning the house...

Doing laundry...

Even going to work...

Why?

Why was it so hard for me to do the work?

At this time in my life I knew the processing tools, but I wasn't taking action on them.

I thought...

"What is wrong with me?"

When I ask myself this question "what is wrong with me" I truly mean it...I start searching for what's wrong with me.

I don't beat myself (anymore), I merely look for the problem so I can fix it.

I searched and searched and searched...and eventually found it.

Guess what the problem was?

A set of beliefs.

Parts of me believed:

"If I face my past it's going to hurt like hell...and it won't be worth it."

"I can't handle the pain."

"I don't even think I'm capable of working through that pain..."

Now, rationally I knew all these beliefs weren't true...facing my past would be worth it, I could handle the pain, and I am capable.

But, when I got honest with myself I discovered that PARTS of me believed these untruths.

And even if there is a part of you that believes something to be true...YOU will act in accordance with that belief!

Maybe not all the time, but in certain situations that unconscious belief system will control you like a puppet on a string.

So, that was the source of my inaction...

Those beliefs were the source of my resistance to sitting down and doing the work I needed to do.

I learned that one of the best ways to identify a belief is by looking at your actions.

Your actions and aversions reveal all.

If you're doing something, good or bad?

You have a set of beliefs causing you to do it.

If you're NOT doing something that you want to do?

You have a set of beliefs that prevent you from doing that thing.

Now with beliefs come emotions.

And releasing the emotional charge while changing the belief is essential for a full and complete belief change.

So when I discovered these beliefs I worked to change them...logically AND emotionally.

And when I did that?

I could sit down and do the work.

Sometimes for full days.

If you're unable to do something (or stop doing something) take an honest look at the beliefs (and emotions) that are driving those actions.

I hope it changes your life as it did mine.

Take care, my friend.

— BRAD SCHIPKE

“No one can heal you, but YOU!”

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